an Orthodox Christian conservative.
For those who know me well, this is no huge surprise. However, for my audience that comprises the vast majority of my audience, I wanted to make this perfectly clear. Why? This feels good to get off my chest.
I whole-heatedly love Jesus and I work daily to be sure that I reflect that. Like anyone, I sin and fall short of the Glory of God. Why? Because I'm human. Do I write this proclamation to seem "holier than thou"? Nope. No one that I've met and interacted with can say that I ever treated them poorly because of my beliefs. I've had my highs and lows like anyone else in the world. I gained salvation at a young age though I didn't fully understand it until 2015. From that point, I worked incredibly hard and diligently to get closer to my God and I was successful in that. I love people and I treat them how I want to be treated. However, I have had the misfortune of being snubbed or ghosted because of my beliefs.
Once I got to college, I held strong for a while but my naivete caused me to fall short in my dealings with people. I began to derail a bit as I tried to cope with how disingenuous other people can be and it set me in a bad place emotionally. Through that trial, I gradually began to remember my faith because God is the same. He never changes and that brought me comfort. Over 2020, I began to heal in my heart. It began when the Lord sent me to Jeff. City for a leadership conference. I truly learned over that span of three days that when God intends to heal you, you will be healed in a why that makes you feel so whole. I experienced this phenomenon at this faith-based conference, I still start to tear up when I think about this because I was spiraling back into that depression that I was freed from.
When the pandemic hit, I took it as down time to reconnect with my savior and get back into reading the Word. Even at this moment, I am grateful to be still living in that grace and forgiveness, and love. I've lived through all sorts of other miracles as well, including the supernatural healing from diabetes that I developed in 2011.
And Lord knows on the conservative point, I've been fearful to talk about openly because of all the extremism. I am 23. I've always had conservative views in my life which I credit to Christianity. As I entered the college landscape, I felt less and less comfortable about discussing my views. People get so angry when it comes to that. So, so angry. Nowadays, I only have 2 or 3 people outside of family that I can have a civil conversation with and non of us believe the exact same things but, that is okay. Isn't diversity the beauty of humanity? I think many people have forgotten that diversity is allowed to exist in mentality as well as skin color but, I digress.
When I first started building on this website, one of my main objectives was to be transparent with my audience and I'm writing this letter pre-launch because I don't want to be misinterpreted. I typically stay away from public discourse on this because I'm not that confrontational but, I do possess strong opinions. As mentioned in previous blogs, I love my human rights, especially free speech. But that seems exceedingly difficult with the rise of mental bondage. Bondage in the form of, " If I speak my mind, someone will damage me." Well I'm tired of that. I shouldn't have to feel as though I am coming out because I respect people a lot more than they'll respect me. I've been told to my face that if I believed a certain thing or if I voted a certain way, that a relationship would be considerably damaged.
As a person who is extremely compassionate, that got me down for a while until I thought about it. It's not the many years of bonding that makes this friendship thrive but rather its my personal philosophy? To some people, that makes perfect sense. Me though? No. If you command certain treatments from the world you need to treat people how you want to be treated. I refuse to feel stifled or like I must walk on eggshells to appease any human, my servitude belongs to God.
Aside from the whole deal with Ravelry, a couple of years ago now, I typically don't bring world issues onto my channel...
Hmm I forgot about that Vlogust video I did on why I'll never start a brick and mortar....
I typically stray away from this sort of content because I believe that craftspace = happy place. And as we have witnessed, these topics can be incredibly divisive.
All this to say, I want people to understand when they interact with me or my content, they're supporting the little Christian, conservative Missouri girl.
If you decide to stick around now, thank you for your love an support as Infiniti Crafting Co. moves forward. I feel like I have a weight off my chest and shoulders and I'll never put myself under this pressure again. In my personal circle, I've affirmed that the same people who would ditch me now are the same people who didn't support me during the so called BLM summer. They likely never will after reading this and that's fine.
I greatly value my freedom.